What’s with the bread knife?

I first wrote an essay about my migraines entitled, “Staring Longingly at a Bread Knife” a few years ago. This began a series of other essays shortly after. Often times, I do stare longingly at my bread knife, deciding whether or not to saw off the top portion of my head with it. As much as I still want to, the bread knife represents my sanity of choosing not to, hence my blog title.

Why did you lie to us about your name?

I enjoyed talking smack about the people in my life and wanted to stay anonymous. Then, my life flew out of control with all my addictions (FaceBook included) and I realized that there was nothing better than the truth.

Why bother returning?

I really missed expressing myself literally and visually. So, consider this more a photography blog, with my journey of sobriety, peppered with stories of my family life that keep me sane.

What kind of a camera do you use?

I use a Canon 50D, but when I get lazy, it’s often the camera on my iPhone or a Canon SD700. Most photos do get altered through the Lo-Mob application on my iPhone, but most aren’t.

Will there still be pictures of Bowie? I really enjoyed those.

I hope so. Bowie is getting less and less patient with me, in addition to getting a bit hefty. Only anorexic dogs, since the camera does add 10 pounds or 70 in dog pounds.

I miss guilty noodles.

So do I, but as I mentioned before, I was tired of living a lie. Besides, this blog will be WAY better. I swear.

If you do decide to saw your head off with a bread knife, will you post a video?

Um, no. I’m hoping that will never happen. And if you have to ask, you probably shouldn’t be reading my blog, you dirty little shit.


2 thoughts on “FAQ

  1. There’s a photo in your flickr album that looks like it might be a Polaroid and it’s of you and someone who I presume to be one of your sons. It has a very red cast to it that is very pleasingly saturated. I tried to comment on the photo itself, but I didn’t want to start a yahoo account.

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